I’m a dog person. When I meet a dog I always end up gushing, “I love you and I just met you!” When it comes to kids, I take it on a kid-by-kid basis. I think it’s surprising to some because I’m a pretty tender person but it’s extremely rare for me to get that squishy maternal feeling when I see a baby. Would I like to hold her? No, I’m good, thank you. I may sound like a horrible person, and I could be completely misunderstood but logically, kids are narcissistic. It’s not their fault, you have to mature and grow to learn to see and care for the needs of others. When you are too little to take care of others, of course you’re constantly concerned about your own needs. It’s just nature. Until recently, it has generally been my least favorite stage of human being.

Due to a series of circumstances, I didn’t meet my niece and nephew until they were 2 and 5. I have to say I was a little nervous. I prayed that I would like them. Luckily, they are one of the most wonderful little people I’ve ever met. Insanely hyper, but loving and sweet and adorable. They’ve also helped open my eyes to how precious kids are. I’m starting to appreciate little people more.

I do like the glimpses of “kid-dom” I get to see now that I’m invited into my niece and nephew’s world. How children think and interact is fun to watch. We were at the park the other day in this cute lil’ nearby mountain town. I was sitting on a bench with my sister watching the two of them play when another little girl joined. Immediately my niece ran up to her and said, “Hi! Would you like to play with us? I’m six.” The girl responded smilingly, “Yeah! What do you want to play? Hey daddy! Dad! She’s six!” Then they ran to the slide together.

I looked at my sister wide-eyed. I remembered when I was that way. “Yeah, we really lose something simple and pure when we grow up.” She said with a half smile.

What an uncomplicated and beautiful exchange. My sister and I joked for a while about how different the world would be if grownups kept that open friendliness. I imagined myself at a coffee shop walking up to a lady sitting at a table and saying, “Hi, do you want to come sit at my table? I’m thirty-nine. I got a mocha.” And we immediately become friends.

This world is full of beauty but it’s hard. Growing up in it you learn to put up walls. Layer by layer. You learn that not everyone is nice, that sarcasm is a favorite form of entertainment, that beauty is what makes people in popular industries relevant. You learn that you are supposed to dress a certain way, speak a certain way, and form yourself into a pleasing little package. People’s approval becomes central and the lack of it can be crushing.

That’s what is so great about coming to a place where you really, truly believe that God loves you. That he made you on purpose because he wanted to and with gifts only you have to offer. That knowledge starts to set you free. It removes the layers you thought you needed to protect yourself because they are no longer necessary. Other people’s approval is nice but it really doesn’t hold as much weight anymore. Hollywood used to look so glamorous but now I see how empty it is and my heart hurts for those caught up in its shallow standards. Rejection is never fun but I can brush it off a lot faster now that I’m secure in the knowledge that the one who made roses and stellar nurseries adores me.

If you don’t believe in your heart that God loves you, I was in your spot. I wish I could explain how I went from doubting his love for me to being certain of it. What a handy little formula that would be. I think what I have come to realize is God does the changes and that’s why I can’t explain how I got from point A to B. But there are things that help the process. It helps to find scriptures that speak to you about his love and who you are in Christ and to speak them over yourself every day. Spend time in worship and in his word. Listen to preachers who believe in and communicate the love of God. Those things alone don’t change your heart but somehow he does while you are spending time with him.

I used to get disappointed when my friends didn’t meet my expectations. If they were consistently late or didn’t follow through on their word, I would let it annoy me. Then one day God showed me a different way of looking at things. He said, Gayle, if you allow yourself to get your love and affirmation from me, you can have more grace on others. You can love them without holding them to a standard and you can allow them to fail you without it affecting your emotions. He wasn’t saying don’t have wisdom in friendship, but he was teaching me to love more like he does. This world has enough cynicism in it. I want to be open, like a kid walking up and saying, lets play! The more assured we are of God’s love for us, the more easily we can love others.

A Part of Renewing Your Mind:

• Look up scriptures about God’s love and who you are in Christ and meditate on them daily.
• Separate time to spend with God in worship. Sing to him, journal, ask God to speak his truth over you.
• Listen to teachings that communicate the grace and love of God.

Need help renewing your mind to God’s love? See similar post:

Replacing lies with God’s truth (who you are in Christ). – Time With The Father