Have you ever returned home to find that your house has been burned to the ground? Then you get the news your family, those most precious to you, have been kidnapped? Then the people who see you as a leader become embittered against you and not only want you dead, but are threatening to carry out the deed themselves? David in the Bible had a day like that. And I find myself thinking of that passage lately. Sometimes there are seasons in life when everything sucks and things just seem to pile on. This year has been hard. Both my husband’s side of the family and mine have come against heartbreaking or hard challenges. I have felt a lot more like grumbling than writing lately. But there is a little voice inside, a quiet and obnoxious one, that says, “Don’t quit.” I believe in a God of miracles but there have been a lot of disappointments lately.

So what did David do when the town was burned to the ground, their daughters and wives taken captive and his men threatened to stone him to death?

1 Samuel 6:30 says: …. but David strengthened himself in the Lord. Another version says he encouraged himself in the Lord. I find it incredibly interesting that the Bible doesn’t say God encouraged him. Here is this man who had a huge (at this point unfulfilled) destiny on his life to reign over all of Israel for God’s glory. You would think an angel would come down and minister to him or God would send a sign but it simply says David encouraged himself in the Lord. To me, what that says is it is our responsibility as mature believers to intentionally quiet our souls no matter what is going on around us. We need to put our eyes on the Father and remind ourselves that he is with us and is capable of turning things around. And then we ask for wisdom on what to do (David’s second step). The Lord told me once that he can work in whatever areas that I give to him and allow him to work in. That means there is responsibility on my part. Everyone has ways of dissociating when things get hard from drugs or alcohol to over-working or to binge-watching tv etc. My disassociation tends to lean towards tv, and food. It’s a socially acceptable way to escape. But when things get hard, I know I need to not take the easy route. I need to get alone and quiet my noisy soul, press into prayer and worship, or sometimes just sit in the silence. I can’t hear God with a distracted mind.

When David strengthened himself in the Lord, the Strong’s Concordance says that word in the original language actually means: To fasten upon, to seize, be strong, obstinate, to bind, restrain, conquer. It means he set himself on God’s encouragement like a bulldog. If you’re going through something hard, fight the temptation to dissociate. Be intentional to spend purposeful time with the God who can turn things around. Worship, even with a heavy heart and turn your ear to him. If your mind is so busy you don’t hear him, then keep setting apart intentional quiet time until you do. James 1:5 says God gives wisdom liberally to those who ask. He loves you. He sees you. And just like with David, he can turn everything around and bring complete restoration.

How-to Summary:

1. Take the time to honestly reflect on how you dissociate when going through challenges. Identify the things you turn to for comfort that are not God. They may be destructive or seemingly innocent.

2. Once you’ve identified your “crutches”, you can become aware and intentional about changing your habits. Ask the Lord to help you turn to him for comfort instead of to destructive or unproductive habits. Push past your flesh and start small. Instead of immediately running to something else, spend ten minutes listening to worship or in prayer. Ten minutes doesn’t feel overwhelming and can easily turn into longer.

3. When you’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, defeated or depressed, you’re not alone. The Bible if full of characters that were confronted with huge challenges. Encourage yourself in the Lord by making yourself switch your focus from the problem to God’s promises. Put on your favorite worship music, google and read encouraging scriptures, quiet your soul to hear God speaking over the situation.

4. It’s your responsibility to remind yourself of God’s love for you. Cling to his promises and refuse to let discouragement be your focus. God sees you, hears you, and loves you.